Eurovision 2010

We are having our Eurovision party tomorrow so I've been trying to build up/store some sleep so I can survive the 3 hour marathon! I didn't drag myself downstairs until just after 10 this morning and I'm already exhausted... so I guess it'll be another early night tonight if I manage to get comfy! This hasn't happened much recently and I simply keep waking up at silly times. Last night was 1.30am, 5.30am and not much sleep between them.

I have to admit to having no real ideas food wise other than I want pate and french bread. Which I'm not allowed to eat but I have missed it so much! One thing I may do is have a glass of wine...our NCT teacher said one glass can't hurt and it it calms my dancing bump down I'll be a happy Mum!! To be honest he's much better as creasting heartburn at the moment - Maybe it's the lack of room that has calmed to movements down, athough every so often he seems to just want to move and nothing is going to stop him! Somehow I get the feeling we're going to have one very determined child to cope/deal with!

The last Eurovision party we actaully managed to have was back in 2007... I sort of messed up the 2008 plans by being in a coma at the time and last year we were in Oslo at the time - sort of Ironic seeing as that is where the Final is coming from this year! I have to admit I loved Oslo, we saw it in the sun/heat and the rain and it looked good in both! I'm relieved that is isn't as hot as it was on the 17th May last year - no way could I cope with that much heat/sun right now!

Once I get through this weekend (I am looking forward to it, honest!) my next target is Fathers Day... I have bought my darling Andy a present in the past, but in the last few years I was so sure it would never happen I have avoided it like the plague - but now he is already a Dad whether the baby is here or not and I want to celebrate the fact. Also I feel he has missed so much, he can't feel when the baby moves etc and even telling him is usually too late as the movement stops as soon as I say anything!

Braxton Hicks

I've been suffering from these all day today...I'm really not enjoying it and I'm fairly sure the baby isn't either. It possibly hasn't helped that today was my Aunt's funeral up in Yorkshire and I really wanted to be there - but it wasn't my choice and I was told in no uncertain terms, immediately after I'd heard she'd died, that I wasn't going. To be perfectly honest the way I've felt today I can understand why the decision was made, but it hurt that it wasn't a decision I made...

That sounds quite silly to me reading it back but I know how I feel and I loved my Aunt, she used to tell me that she loved me and that is something I am really going to miss - and I hate that I haven't been able o say goodbye in the way I would want to. As she is being cremated I can't even go to a grave later - although I'm not sure what is going to happen to her ashes -maybe there will be a grave of some description...

Today has been quite a bit cooler than yesterday - one thing I am very grateful for! Andy (bless him) put the baby room thermometer in our bedroom last night, I wish he hadn't as it glowed red as it was far too hot in there and we are really going to have to keep it cooler once there are 3 of us sleeping in there... I did notice that Andy escaped downstairs at around 3am when I was up for the 2nd or 3rd time. When he left for work I was simply ready to sleep for a few more hours, but then the BH contractions started so I gave up on sleep and went downstairs to sit in front of the tower fan again (where I still am as I'm still feeling far too hot)

Tomorrow a group of Mums to be from our ante natal class are off to 'Bumps & Babes' but are meeting in Starbucks at 9.00 before hand! So no lie in possible for tomorrow, I just hope the bump behaves itself...I know I was worried on Sunday when he didn't move much, but after today I would really appreciate a calm day! But then again if he is too quiet I'll only worry again!!

34 Weeks

Possibly we only have 4 weeks left seeing as I was told at the end of last year that I would only be allowed to go to 38 weeks...but then again since then we've had a few scares and it really hasn't been mentioned much since! But hopefully after the scan on 8th June we should have a clearer idea of what, how and when! Alhough having been talked through a C Section at the ante natal class yesterday I really would prefer to avoid that unless it is totally needed... but the baby comes first and if there is a problem and that is the safest way for him to arrive then that is what will happen.

I've been shopping this afternoon...a major trip to Mothercare! We pretty much filled my car again and Andy has a baby monitor to play with now! We also now have new baby sized nappies so I won't need duct tape to stop them falling off the baby!! Also Andy has 'proper' bottles to steralise rather than trying to do that to water bottles and melting them! I guess it is all becoming much more real now...we're almost prepared for a small person to move in... the moses basket is on order, the pushchair is arriving on 9th June and we've bought the top & tail bowl as we can't bath him for the first week... I guess it's time to read Dr Spock as I have no idea how to do that!

Probably time for bed now...my ankles are turning into cankles righ now and I'm ready for a sleep before I get woken at 3am as usual for the early morning bathroom dash!

2 days running!!!

This is not like me to blog 2 days running...and to be perfectly honest there really isn't much going on in Heather World right now but here goes!!!

This morning was my weekly midwife check up day - they are wonderful people who come to me which means I don't endanger the population of Ashford by being let lose with a mechanical killing/maiming machine (aka a car!)

Today I got to meet a different midwife as poor Nicki was rushing around like a proverbial headless chicken! Bev was really sweet and as Nicki told me by phone much quieter than her!! But she still had to report back to Nicki once she'd checked me and the baby and Nicki is back next week...Sunday morning after the Eurovision party!!! So hopefully we won't make too much mess to have to clear once I drag myself out of bed on Sunday morning! Today I got patted on the head and pretty much had a glowing report - my blood pressure wasn't as good as it has been but it is nowhere near being considered a problem or high so I just have to carry on doing whatever it is I am doing! When I was trying to get up this morning Idid experience a horrible pain in my pelvis, when I mentioned this I got well prodded to try and find where the baby was and it is apparently him trying to get his head engaged... next stage labour!!!! It usually causes quick 'flashes' of pain which finish very quickly and it is basically the baby shuffling around! I just hope he gets sorted quickly as I can honestly say it really did hurt this morning and it isn't the way I like to be woken up at the moment!!

One other bit of excitement today was the arrival of my new phone...all I can say at the momeont is it looks very nice, as it will take about 48 hours for it to be fully connected for some reason. As I only have one sim card it is now in the new phone so I'm fairly unreachable right now as it isn't recognising the sim so I'm not getting any messages etc!! I'm currently charging the battery and I may even read the instruction book at some point... but to be honest it isn't very Heather friendly as it is mostly black printed on Grey and is not eye friendly or laid ou in a clear/helpful way - but I'm sure if I just play I'll work it all out! What is good is that it fits into the case I have for the current phone, and even though that has 'Sony' Plastered on it at least the touch screen will be protected on the new one! Well it is only 40is days until my birthday... Andy if you're reading this that is called a subtle hint!!! I've also just though I can add the 'mobile jewellery' that Nicky brought me from Disney last year to my new phone - that will help make it more mine/unique!!

I need sleep...

I think I'm in training for my sleepless nights at the moment...3.06am this morning someone decided that his mother should be up and around!! I think he was bouncing his head on my bladder and it is safe to say that my joints were not in a fit state to move at any kind of speed!

So far this week has been pretty quiet - just what I need really. I have to admit I am having lot sof naps as something (or someone) is sapping all my energy... but I know it will all  be worth it in the end. All I can say is I now know God is male - no woman woul have ever agreed that pregnancy should be this long! And the more I think about it the more I want to come back as a Seahorse! The males look after the babies - or we should be redesigned with a Kangeroo pouch so the child/baby care/carrying can be shared! I do feel envious (or at times guilty) that Andy has missed out on feeling the baby move around and grow. I guess in a way I'm already bonding with him as I feel him move - I have an idea of what sort of music calms him and what he enjoys (he can make that very clear!!) so I feel as though I almost know him... I really can't wait to meet him now :)

I wonder how old he will be before his father starts brainwashing him with Star Trek! Thankfully I haven't seen any baby uniforms anywhere...and no way am I letting ridges be added to his head poor little mite!!! But I do know a tricorder and a phaser have been kept for him so I guess the inititation will start asap!!

At the moment I'm watching the Classical Brits from alst night  - and I think he's quite enjoying the Strauss! I have no problem using classical music to send him to sleep, maybe once he has a passport I'll have to take him to Vienna (somewhere I've always wanted to visit) Maybe I could even convnce Andy to dance with me!! He never has on any of the cruises we've done, the only time I've ever danced on a cruise was in 2000 with my Dad!!! Myleene Klass appears to be wearing a Turkey as a dress! Although having watched Heston's Ultimate Feast last night I dread to think what may have been combined in her dress!

I got quite excited this morning - I found a top I've never worn before and it fits!!!! The only problem is it has horizontal stripes and the bump looks even bigger in them than in a 'normal' top! But I guess I am quite proud of it - after all I'v spent the last few years trying to convince myself that it would never happen to me. I'm still blaming the consultant who sorted out my Kidney stone(s) as I'm sure he must have zapped something else with his laser! Failing that I'm blaming Switzerland! The day the stone(s) were sorted was the first time they tried the big collider machine so it could also be their fault!!! Mind you the treatment they started me on for diabetes is also used as an infertility treatment, but the chances are I was already pregnant before I started taking Metformin!! Maybe someone up there finally decided it was my turn!!!

I've just seen one of my favourite compsers has a new album out...Amazon Wish list here it comes! Einaudi is another composer the baby enjoys and hs music seems to invoke sleep - One day I may even hear the whole album as my usual reaction is to relax and fall asleep by track 3!!! I don't think he appreciates Sopranos though, he's just given me on hell of a kick as one has started screeching an aria from Madam Butterfly!

Odd moods...

I'm blaming my hormones but for the last few days I have been in what can only be described as a most decidedly odd mood. The strangest things are winding me up for no real reason and I just get very annoyed/angry and then even more wound up as I can find no reason for feeling the way I am...

Still having trouble sleeping, this morning at just after 3am Adrian was annoying someone outside who was bellowing at the top of their voice. No idea who or where they were as I couldn't be bothered to move out of bed to look out of the window as, basically, it simply hurts to much and I can't move quickly until all my joints start working again and if I end up in a heap on the floor I doubt very much that Andy will be able to move me.

Once the mystery bellower had vanished I did manage to go back to sleep until about 4 when someone did his usual 'I'm awake wriggle' - which was quite welcome as he'd been very quiet all day Saturday, but by 5am he was in serious wriggle mode so I had to dash next door as he was using my bladder as a drum and there is a limit to how long I can try to ignore that!! I then retreated downstairs to try to get comfortable and check the news that my sister hadn't managed to carry out her threat to Kidnap Michael Buble from the O2 last night! My poor nephew was worried as she said my brother in law would be kept in a box until her 'new' husband got bored with her and she needed Miff back!

Andy is still doing really well with the clear out - my old dressing table went to a new home this morning (I'd gone back to bed at that point) and his Dad is coming over on Wednesday to fill some holes before the slapping on of paint commences...I so hope thay were right with the scans, but I do like blue so even if the baby is a girl she will have to like it as well!! But no way would I ever consider painting a room pink and I've been sure about the sex for months...

I have discovered a cheaper cure than Gaviscon for my indigestion...mint imperials! The mint seems to work well and quite quickly, the only downside is the amount of sugar they contain but I'll just try to be sensible. All I need now is a cure for my back ache as it is getting worse day by day, it can't be down to the baby as he shouldn't be putting that much weight on each day! At least I hope he can't!!!!

A mixed up kind of day

I have had some pampering today!!! My wonderful sister treated me to a haircut and I'm no longer blonde! It was Nicky's idea and I've had a semi permanent tint out on which is a reddish colour and makes my hair look far healthier! I've also had a fair amount chopped off and to be honest feel far better for losing the bulk and weight!! It is also still possible to clip the front back and hopefully keep it out of baby fists! I'm hoping he won't grab my hair and pull too hard...(well I can dream!)

We hit the coffee shop at Waitrose for lunch - I had a beef, horseradish and watercress baguette. It was wonderful and it was followed by  cup cake that was basically a cake version of an after 8 mint taste wise. I've been drooling over their cakes for months and I dread to think what it may have done to my blood sugar levels, but in my defence I'm pregnant and the baby was craving it!!!!

We then moved on to Matalan where the baby gained 3 more little suits - one with Tigger!!! And Nick got a couple of tops...one of which may be trailed on Michael Buble tomorrow night (although I think he may not survive the evening as she wants to take him home with her!) While we were there Nick got a phone call from Dad...My Aunt died this afternoon, thankfully she wasn't ill for that long and now is no longer in pain... Right now I'm not sure how I'm feeling, a bit numb is the closest I can come up with. It has been decided that I am not going to the funeral as the journey would be decidedly uncomfortable for me and also knowing me I'd decide to go into labour up there. The sensible part of me totally understands this, but the emotional bit of me wants the chance to say my final goodbye and close off a part of my life.

I was very proud of the way I didn't fall apart at the news... it was then a quick trip home to pick up my notes then off to my Drs to have my retinal scan done. I'm supposed to have this done 3 times during my pregnancy - this was the second and seeing as I only have 6 weeks (ish) left I don't think there will be another one before I have the baby!!! I have more of less stopped seeing dots from the flash now, and next time I'll have to have the pupil dilating drops - one advantage of being pregnant is you don't have to have them! I hope this time doesn't show any problems - the person taking the pictures didn't pick anything up so there isn't an obvious problem showing right now!

Nothing

The title sums up my life at the moment. Nothing is happening and won't for a few more weeks and much as I'd love to speed things up there is nothing I can do to safely achieve that.

I know being at home is helping me and I feel 100 times better than I was doing a month ago - plus I know the stress and all the muttering that will be going on at work plus the second guessing and trying to analyse simple straightforward comments would be driving me up the wall - however much the 'boss' asks people not to I know that the only topic of conversation will be exactly what they don't want it to be. I would have only ended up feeling even more excluded than normal as I know I wouldn't want to join in as I prefer to keep my opinions and thoughts re redundancy to myself...I need to work through things in my way.

One thing I have done this week is actally buy some maternity clothes! I got fed up trying to fit into clothes I already had and feeling extremely uncomfortable all day. I was very lucky that I heard about Mamms & Papas closing in the outlet! Viva told us on Monday at the NCT Mum's get together so I dragged Andy in on Tuesday (didn't help his grumpy mood!!) and I also nipped in yesterday as the trousers I bought on Tuesday are already in their smallest size and keep falling down!! I bought another pair but they are a tad long and as they have turn ups are a littel beyond my sewing skills to turn up! If anyone has any suggestions on how I do that please let me know!!! I also bought a skirt that is a size I'd never have contemplated before I was pregnant... It does appear that I'm not putting that much weight on, nuch to my relief! I think ANdy is very relieved that the shop closes today so I'll not be nipping in again - but in my defence I have saved over £130 on the ful priced stuff and it will still be useful after I've had the baby :) All I need to do now is stretch a bit more so he has enought room and doesn't kick and shove so much!!! Although it is fun trying to identify body parts when he does!! He seems to enjoy having his head strocked, but he does seem to have realised now that there really isn't room to somersault any more so I'll have to wait until he arrives to do that again...

One thing I've really noticed this week is my appetite has vanished again. The thought of eating makes me feel really ill at the moment, and the idea of cooking doesn't help either. Cookery programmes are great as I can't smell anything, but they don't inspire me to actually eat. Andy keeps worrying that the baby will suffer, but I'm hardly fading away and the baby will take whatever he needs if I'm eating or not! As Dr Bob told me last year they are basically parasites and won't suffer...if they need something they will find it and take it! And all his growth charts are fine/normal and weight wise he seems perfectly average...thankfully not a dreaded 'Sugar Baby'!!!!

Tomorrow is a little more exciting! I'm having my hair cut!!! No idea what I'm going to have done so again any suggestions (sensible please!!!) are welcome! I know it needs to be shorter so it's quicker to control and I think having been growing the fringe out for over a year I'm having that put back in... but other than that I'm stuck!

Penultimate clinic...

Or at least I hope so!

I was up at 4.30 this morning - scans now terrify me as they are so good at finding problems for us so I retired to the bathroom for an early morning contemplation session. There was no chance of going back to sleep with the noise Andy was creating through snoring etc. I'm now wondering who will wake who up once the baby is here!!! But I guess he should at least know what the noise is as he's already heard it!

By 7 I'd had enough and got up and dressed, Andy also woke up (probably due to me opening the curtains!) and went downstairs to have a nap!! I was good this morning and even had breakfast with my glass of apple juice and pile of pills!

We got to the hospital just after 9 as I needed to have a blood test done and Tuesday is ACC (??) blood clinic day which does make things rather manic! I got my ticket at about 9.15 and finally got in jsut before 10! As usual the veins in both arms vanished so I now have yet another nice bruise apearing on the back of my left hand, in exactly the same spot the bruise from the last blood test has just vanished from! But at least it's done now and we then headed over to the X-ray reception to check in for the scan... 15 minutes later we were headed for fetal medicine as ther ewas a slight queue mainly made up of people who hadn' bothered to bring the appointment letters with them!! One in the right place we didn't have to wait long and the scan was underway. The first thing found was his heart which was beating fine and no comments about arteries thank goodness! Lots of measurements were made and he is perfectly in the middle of all expected graphs and isn't too big - right now he is just over 4lbs which I'm quite happy with as we still have 6 weeks to go!!!

Unfortuntely the placenta is behind him and they sonographer couldn't quite make out where it is situated...so at the next scan I have to have an internal one so they can get a clearer picture about there it is. I can honestly say I'm not looking forward to that having just googled it...But at least we will then know the safest option for his birth - but at the moment labour is looking more likely than a c-section!!!

Post 100!

Well it's taken me a while but I've finally hit 100 entries!! Plus we've also hit 32 weeks so I guess I'm now officially 8 months pregnant... something I really never thought would happen to me :) I'm happily getting fat now, the diet starts in July!!

I had a small breakthrough today - I managed to drive to Sainsburys on my own and got home without hitting anyone or anything!!! I can't say I was comfortable and it didn't hurt - right now I'm feeling decidedly in pain but it is bearable so I'm still avoiding taking any painkillers. The baby is awake and I prefer feeling him move during the day rather than have him wriggling all night and keeping me awake! And I feel guilty if I take something which has an effect on him as he has no say in the matter... Does this mean I'm going to be a guilt ridden Mum???

One thing that realy 'hit' me this morning was the state of the 'Cow roundabout' (Officially known as Drovers Roundabout) For some reason every tree and bush that was previously on it has been cut down. It is apparently something to do with road widening and drainage work (I'm really not looking forward to them starting that lot!) but it doesn't feel that long since they relaid the brick work round the edge of it - what a waste of time and money that was! The removal of trees may not be a good thing anyway... it may just be down to pregnancy brain but it felt to me that everyone was driving round it an awful lot faster than they ever used to before. I wonder how long it will be until there is a pile up...or has it already happened?? The trees along the road from Junction 9 to the roundabout have also been removed, the whole area looks desolate now - I wonder if anything will be replanted to replace what has been killed/destroyed? I do hope so, I much prefer living in a predominantly green area (Maybe I'll have to move to Brighton...!!)

I got the employee pack from work yesterday... It is safe to say once I've had the baby job hnting will need to start again. I know I didn't want to go back to Dover anyway, but it hurts having the decision taken away from me and it feels as though I've been thrown on a rubbish heap yet again. My plan was to find a part time job somewhere closer to home - but I need to find out how long my maternity pay will continue for as it looks as though the work is off to Belfast in early September, but I have had it in writing that ordinary Maternity Leave lasts until 29th October so I'm not sure if they can change it now... But at least I should get something for redundancy at least (although the paranoid voice in my head keeps telling me they'll try to wriggle out of paying me anything)

The morning after the night before....

Well as elections go that one was a dead loss!!! Nobody is an outright winner and Gordon Brown hasn't yet resigned as he seems to think he can carry on. Personally I'm fed up being represented by a big, grey, unsmiling man to the rest of the world...But that is my opinion and I'm also pregnant to my opinions are rather odd at the best of times!

As Dave has said the result in Ashford was a foregone conclusion - and we didn't have a Pirate or Monster Raving Looney to add any comedy value... I got a letter from the Conservtives and the Lib Dems shoved a flyer through the door on Wednesday reminding you to go and vote...as for any other candidates I don't have a clue who they were! I certainly didn't hear from any of them or see any sign of a ny campaigning going on... So much for a democratic choice being offered!!!

I did see the first lot of results come in, at which point I retired to bed and I think I passed out!! Once I'd demanded  hug from Andy as I wasn't feeling too great as I heard my job goes in September. I knew it was coming and I'd already decided I wasn't going back but it still hits hard when you actually hear it is going to happen... I haven't yet been told officially, just via Facebook - but to be honest that also fits in with my expectations. I really feel out of sight and out of mind and I don't feel that anyone there is missing me or has even noticed I'm no longer there...It really is time for a change!

I am going to miss one thing about the election campaign...all 3 leaders have a fantastic ability to send our baby to sleep! He wasn't in a rush to wake up this morning either, but since I've turned the news off I've had the usual wriggles and the odd foot, elbow etc poking out...poor little thing is running out of space fast now I think.

Week 31

This has been a nice week...mainly because I've had Andy around! Although I don't think he liked having me around as I slow things down and stop him doing what he wants whne he wants to!! Poor love has now been away from work for 2 weeks and spent the 1st week going up and down to London for  course and the second week emptying what is starting to look more like a nursery thanks to all the stuff Frankie has loaned us. Our baby is now officially going to be far better dressed that either of his parents! I can honestly say nothing I own has a Jasper Conran, Ralph Lauren or Dior label in it! There is also Baby K clothing which is decidedly cute so I really hope the Sonographer has been right and he is a boy!

We also have a steriliser, baby gym, moses basket, bumbo seat and a load of other stuff...my little car was pretty much full to the roof once everything was piled in!  We're both really grateful to Frankie and I feel so much better that we are now much better equipped than before and if he arrives early we can cope with what we currently have - just need to paint now!!!

Yesterday was our 5 hour antenatal class. I admit I was concerned how Andy would feel but he seemed ok...the hysteria regarding using pineapples to trigger labour probably helped! All I will say is use our imaginaition and you'll probably be close to thinking along the lines we 18 did! I felt so sorry for Rachel, we really weren't taking anything seriously at all!!! I think the bit aout the placenta may have made por Andy a little queasy - the chancs of him heading down that end are now none existant! Poor darling thought the plaenta was a bit like a clear jelly I think...finding out it looks like raw liver  and pulsates after you 'give birth' to it really threw him - plus being told it just needs flash frying like blue steak if you want to eat it made him VERY green!! Luckily he doesn't have to go to the next session as it's women only and I think were taling about tearing etc and the really nasty bits...I really don't want to have the first husband to pass out if I can avoid it!!!

Mum and Dad are still on their cruise right now. It looks as though Dad forgot to get international roaming turned on for his phone as it won't work and he's having trouble getting his Notebook connected to the wireless network on board...but we have had a couple of mails from him and they appear to be having a great time. Unfortunately whilst they've been away Mum's cousin has died... it wasn't totally unexpected as she has been fighting Cancer for a while. Thankfully the funeral isn't until after Mum & Dad get back so she can go to say goodbye. Dad's sister has also gone back into hospital, but Nicky & I have only heard about that via facebook and havent had an update yet - plus she is in Yorkshire so there really isn't much we can do from here in Kent.