New Year... New Start?

Well it's now 2010 and there is still a debate regarding how one ahould say the year...is it 20 -10 or 2 thousand and 10? (According to my sister it is the latter as she hates the former for some reason!)

As previously promised (If anyone even reads my drivel!) above is one of the scan photos from Christmas Eve... I have had another scan sionce and apparently will be having a scan a month as the baby and I (hopefully) progress through this pregnancy. My main aim right now is to stop feeling sick so often...I can only believe that morning sickness was named by a man - who was so wrong it's untrue! I'm also really hoping the hormones calm down as I don't want to keep biting Andy's head off, it really isn't fair on him.

Ok, enough baby talk - I'll try to stop now although it isn't easy when the baby is about all I can think about at the moment... Am I turning into a baby bore???

Oh yes - winter returned to the UK today... more snow and I really don't like driving in snow, it's all those white bullets heading straight towards me, I get decidedly freaked out! Thankfully Andy didn't do too much passenger seat driving today! But he has decreed that heated seats in cars are now officially the work of the devil and should not be allowed. Me, I like feeling warm and toasty and if it's cold I'm turning the heat on so I feel nice and warm and cosy!

Last Christmas...

This is our last Christmas as just 2 of us...provided everything goes well nexy tear there will be 3! Our Christmas started on Christmas Eve with our 12 week scan...it appears we have a bolshy baby with attitude! (s)he was happily laid upside down right no my right hand side which did lead to a minor panic when the trainee sonographer couldn't find the baby! I really didn't enoy that feeling of momentary panic...or the way she dug the probe into me when all I wanted to do was go to the loo!

After haing seen our baby sucking it's thumb happily (after some serious hip shaking!) it was time for blood tests which have left me with a wonderfuly bruised right hand as no other veins were playing ball... and the wanted loads. I did suggest fitting a tap yet again but they weren't too enthusiastic about that unfortunately :(.

Christmas day was simple this year...just he 2 of us for lunch although I was banned from lifting the turkey as it was deemed too heavy for me to cope with... And I would just like to point out that I didn't eat 3/4 of a christmas pudding smothered with custard, I did have a small piece about 2 hours after the main course...but apparently it is unlucky not to finish the whole pudding off!!

We were out Christmas Day evening, even though someone did wake me from a lovely nap to leave the warm house to go into freezing evening...I'm so glad I still have my big black coat to wrap round me!! We got home about 11.30 and I felt shattered...but sleep really didn't happen until about 2am - maybe afternoon naps aren't good for me! I think Andy got a little annoyed with me as I kept telling him how tired I was and then refusing to go to sleep!

Boxing Day is now officially Emily Day as it was her 1st Birthday...where on earth has the last year gone??? It really doesn't feel like 12 months since I was frantically checking every text I got to see if she had decided to arrive or not!?!?!?

If Andy ever gets round to scanning the Scan pictures I'll stick one on here so everyone can get a glimpse of Baby Zerfahs (I'm already one very proud Mum!)

Time to hibernate...

It is now well and truly winter here in the South east of England... I'd forgotten how much I hate driving in snow and I had to do it tonight as it started to snow just as I left work (I also now hate C5 drivers as one kept cutting me up as we went up the A20 out of Dover)

Today has been tough for reasons other than the weather...I'm still feeling very sick for about 23 hours out of 24 and I've also started to suffer with indegestion...thank heavens for Gaviscon!! I think it may be worth buying shares in whoever makes it! I wonder if this has started as I'm sulking as my family have swaned off to Orlando today...a few flakes of snow and they vanish westwards to warmer  weather! I can feel as envious as I want, especially as I couldn't have gone even if I cold afford to! The miserable people won't let me on a plane right now...

Being back at work full time is really exhausting me at the moment - starting in Dover at 8 every morning is challenging! My body really cant see why it should be out of bed when it's dark and cold! This morning was really tough, neither I or Tadpole felt like dragging ourselves out of bed and then stupidly heading outside to de-ice the car!! It doesn't help that the smell of de-icer also makes me feel decidedly sick, so I have to take my gloves off so they don't get covered in the stuff and keep the smell going...

1st week survived!!

I did it - I survived my first week back! To say I was nervous on Monday morning is a fairly major understatement, but I went in to the office and seemed to settle in without too many problems/issues! Well that was once I got back into the Port! I wasn't aware that your pass gets suspended if it isn't used for a certain period of time...it turns out Work weren't aware of that rule either!

At the moment I'm working mornings only, I simply wish mornings started later! The original plan was I was going to work 9-1, but I seem to be getting in earlier somehow (mainly as it is easier to park when I'm in earlier!) so it's now looking more like 8-12. At least I an then go home and have a short restoring nap!

One thing I had forgotten about was the morons who use the M20... the mornings I don't notice them too much as I'm still sleeping, but driving home you see every possible example! Today was full off the middle lane hoggers - one was driving up the middle lane at under 60 at lunchtime totally oblivious of the people passing him on both sides. He had a knitted hat pulled right down almost over his eyes, maybe it was too tight or something?!!??!

It doesn't help getting out of Dover that they are still working on all the lay-byes on the A20 and have dropped it from 2 lanes to 1... the aim is to make it up the hill ahead of as many of the lorries as possible...they just pull across when lane 1 ends without apparently a care in the world...maybe I need flashing fairy lights fitted to my car so they may fianlly notice a little black car before they squash it into next to nothing!

Big News (for me anyway!!)

I have finally got the go ahead/all clear to go back to work! I'm back from 9.00 on Monday and for the first 2 weeks I'm just doing half days to break me in gently. I have to admit to feling rather nervous and apprehensive, I didn't want to be off in the first place and everytime I've tried to go back the reply has been no... but the thought of simply walking back into the office makes me feel rather queasy, especially as Sam is no longer there. Basically I've lost my security blanket so I'm going to have to be a big girl and survive all by myself!!!!

The weather is really getting me down at the moment... I'd be happy if winter would start properly as half the time I don't have a clue what to wear as it can get almost warm some afternoons. I'd like a real winter morning where I can wear a scarf and gloves without feeling totally over dressed! There is a real disadvantage with my car having an aluminimum Gear knob - it can feel so cold! And I am officially a complete wuss so cold gear knobs are a real no no when I'm trying to be awake enough to drive to Dover!

Rememberence Day and thinking too much

It must be the time of the year but I've just been thinking far to much... 10 years ago I really didn't picture myself 'here'. In my mind I would have at least one child by now, probably 2 and they'd both be at school. Instead I don't even have 1 and there is no sign of me having one any time soon and to say the clock is ticking is a huge understatement. I want to be able to enjoy and be pary of my children growing up - I don't want them to be embarrassed by their old mother and not wanting to bring friends home....

Maybe I also want to be in a totally different career - I only wish I knew what!!! All I know is I know it isn't credit control!!! If I could I'd love to find something I could do in child care. I know the pay isn't great but I think I need job satisfaction right now - something I haven't had for years. I'd love a job that I could go home from feeling I had had a good, successful day and had achieved everything I wanted to each day... do jobs like this actually exist in the real world?

Perhaps this is my warning to stop thinking so much... But at the moment it is the main thing I have to do, making plans fills up a whole load of time!

Angry of Ashford...

I'm still slowly trying to get my head around the idea of me and diabetes and looking carefully at everything I eat to check how much sugar may or may not be lurking somewhere within it... It really isn't fun but at least I should start eating a little more healthily now!

I went over to see my parents today to get some presents for some friends in Norfolk as they are going up this weekend and can deliver them for us (saves on postage and worrying about strikes etc) We went to a local shopping centre and Dad offered to buy lunch while we were out, the food court wasn't really an option, Jacket Potatoes are too high in sugar (??), Subway have too many carbs, Burger King and KFC are just out so we decided to try the Cafe in Sainsburys.

Once we'd made it up stairs and fought through the OAP's the menu was anything you wanted so long as it was fried! There were a couple of sandwiches, on white bread of course, but salad or pasta...dream on!! Anyone with any kind of dietary limitations was buggered so we retreated to M&S and bought a couple of salads and then went back to Mum and Dads and ate there! Dad has aso decided that M&S have a superior type of queue, but the assistants should slow down to allow customers to finish any converations before interupting them to actually serve then!!

I was good today and bough my Poppy from a very nice ex-serviceman, WWII I think who assured me that once he had pinned my poppy on there was no way I could lose it like I normally do!

One other thing I meant to do today was find a book on diabetes as my wonderful GP doesn't seem too keen on telling me too much...the consultant I saw yesterday has told me I should be monitoring it closely and testing mysef every day. Apparently my GP should have told me this and have given me the meter to use - I saw my GP yesterday to be told I have to see the nurse about this rather than a Dr...I have an appointment with her on the 13th so I'll carry on floundering around in the meantime. Hopefully I can't get anything too wrong in the meantime!!!