All Change!!

The hair has now gone!!! And so far it's working, the only reaction I've had from Mikey was Wooooo as I waked in and he hasn't tried to grab my hair at all. I haven't really had any reaction from Andy yet, hopefully I may get one eventually!

We went out for lunch today, I wanted to just have some time for the 3 of us but I couldn't get a babysitter of this evening so we went out for lunch. We went to 'The Atrium' in Rochester and it was wonderful. It's a small restaurant but I'm afraid I can't comment on the beer selection as I don't think it's high on their list of priorities!

The place is right on the High Street and quite close to the Cathedral so we had bells pealing through most of lunch as there was a rather large wedding happening, they had good taste in Wedding cars as the one parked by the main door was from Odds cars, the firm our wedding car came from. But it didn't inspire and romantic gestures from Andy - he didn't even hold my hand :(

Getting over to Medway this morning was fun...the M20 was closed so we went via Faversham and the M2, I'd forgotten how much I hate that trip but at least it meant Mikey could have a nap on the way there and coming home the M20 was re-opened so it was much easier! It also meant that he arrived at Nanny and Grandad's ready for lunch which he demolished pretty thoroughly!

Mikey had a wonderful time with Nanny, Grandad and Barley (who is still missing the other part of the family whilst they're in the US - I think Nanny is looking forward to having a dog free bed eventually!) We've hit the next milestone and have finally mastered crawling forward on hands and knees rather than commando crawling forwards and reversing in the correct position, so tomorrow we need to pick up the stair gates and blitz the lounge as now he know what he's doing I have a feeling stopping him is going to be pretty much impossible! Luckily Barley has had sofas and the garden as escape routes, Mikey can't get outside on his own yet...although he has mastered opening and closing doors so long as he remembers to keep his legs out of the way!!

Whittering time....

Time for a whinge…so I apologise now! But this page is for me to whitter on and right now that's what I need to do! For some reason at the moment I am absolutely exhausted, lethargic is an understatement and I could easily sleep around the clock - plus my infamous headache seems to be trying to reassert it's dominance. There is no point talking to my GP as if you mention headache they simply shut down and ignore you (oh and prescribe paracetamol which do precisely nothing to help)


Mikey isn't helping either bless him…he is getting more and more vocal now and seems to think Mummy and Daddy understand every word he says. And if for some reason they don't he just repeats it louder again and again until they do! He's also getting more and more mobile…Andy is really going to have to bring the stair gates home soon as I don't think it'll be long until he tried to pull himself up the stairs and if you take your eyes off him for a second he is off! I suppose I could just get an extending dog lead and tether him somewhere (I'm being a bad mother again :( sorry)

I'm still totally shattered - Mikey was awake at 4am for the 2nd morning running and he seems to be thriving on it! Me on the other hand - not so good! I went to bed at a sensible time but couldn't fall asleep…and even when I did apparently I was talking in my sleep so relaxation wasn't happening. I have no recollection of any dreams so I have no idea what I was being responsible for or who the staff were that I was worrying about. It was probably another Norfolkline flashback/nightmare, one day I'll grow out of them and at least I'm not screaming in my sleep! (That'll probably be tonight!)

I've just read a report on the 'man' (In the loosest possible term) who carried out the attacks in Norway. It's starting to look as thought his defence is going to be insanity. He believes that his actions will be totally vindicated in 60 years time…I'm sure the families of his victims who were pretty much randomly selected will have forgiven him by then and will understand that their loved ones had to die - or at least they will if the world turns into cloud cuckoo land. What also annoys me is Norwegian law restricts his sentence to 21 years unless he's convicted of crimes against humanity, then it can go up to 30. In reality he should be locked in a nice dark, damp dungeon somewhere and left to rot… and then I'm happy to keep the key somewhere safe! It'd never be seen again…such a shame! The events in Oslo really upset me, it is one of my favourite places in the world and when we were there in 2009 on Norway day it was packed with thousands and thousands of people, some celebrating rather hard! And I never felt in even the slightest bit of danger - even with my map reading skills trying to get us back to the ship! The Norwegian people I have met have always been very very friendly and helpful, you never feel as though you are a stranger ion their country, you are just a welcome guest they want to get to know. I guess in a naïve way that's how I['d like the whole of this planet to be… We're all the same species so why should there be issues and problems between countries??

This is all getting a little deep for a Tuesday with a headache! Maybe it’s time for the big pink pain pills (try saying that quickly with a headache!!) After all I really don't think you can rattle too much every day… And I'm seriously considering running for office in Norway so I can deal with the big. blond bully.

My last 2 weeks have only been 4 days…last Friday I had to have a diabetes eye test - not fun as it was VERY sunny and the drops really stung and then I have very dilated pupils so the sun seemed even brighter than it really was! Thankfully my eyes seemed back to normal (well normal for me) by 4ish, I have to admit nappy changing when they were at their worst was fun - Mikey wriggles at the best of the time but at one point I could see several of him!


Monday was Mikey's turn to go to the Drs - it was injection time and he had to have 3 - one of which was the famous MMR. He also had the Meningitis C, HIB and pneumonia vaccine - I was advised to give him a dose of Calpol before I took him and a chocolate drop per injection seemed to cheer him up fairly quickly (Maybe Mummy should have had some as she got traumatised too when he screamed) The silly nurse also thought he was jaundiced as he's got a tan…and when I said it was a tan and nothing worse I got lectured about putting sun cream on him….do I really look this stupid? (Answers not required!)

When we got home Mikey decided the best way to deal with injections was to fall asleep. I have to admit that I just watched him breath for ages - something I haven't done since he was first moved into SCBU (told you I was traumatised) But since then he's just got on with being Mikey! He is getting more and more talkative and we are crawling backwards fairly quickly - forwards is a pretty impressive commando crawl! And I'm convinced he was eyeing up the sofa this morning to see if he can pull himself up. But I guess the next stage has to arrive at some point whether I want it to or not! The photo is Mikey sleeping off he trauma!!

As for me at the moment I feel rough and look rougher…Much as I love and adore my son when I had my week off I would have loved a day when all I had to worry about was me… Does that make me a bad mother? I'd just like a day when I can be the me I used to be rather than being someone's wife or mother… But I guess I'll never have that again - I will be Mikey's Mum for the rest of my life, but then again I did want that and have been trying for a very long time to achieve my desire!

It's been a quiet day at work today… I had a very productive morning but now I am tempted to just put my head on my desk and sleep…If I switch desks and borrow Tess' desk nobody could see me and I may get away with it! But then again my manager did say I could leave at 4 as I'm feeling so crap so I might just go home and sleep… I just need to wake up while Andy is out so I can put Mikey to bed, in another bad Mother moment I hope he's tired so he'll want to go up a little early and then I can go to sleep again!! He really deserves a more caring Mum, poor little mite (OK, not so little now - yesterday he was eating chicken, chips and salad - (lunch at the pub!) and apparently got angry whenever Debbie stopped feeding him - we may well have created a monster!!)

Nothing planned for this weekend or the foreseeable future - although I am now seriously thinking about getting my hair chopped off. I seem to have got into the habit of shutting it in my car door for some reason - and have taken to swearing in German because of the small ears usually sat behind me! Plus I want a change, I'm fed up with usually having it in a pony tail so I think it's time to actually get a style of some sort again…this time comments are invited as I have no idea what I want other than it just to be different! And not the grade 2 someone suggested last night! But I'm not going blonde again - been there and done it, I think I may stay as a brunette now, with just home colours to hide the signs of aging as they grow…But if I get round to making an appointment hopefully it'll happen next weekend so I'll at least have that to look forward to.

Milestone achieved....

Well I survived! I was supposed to see my neurologist on the morning of my birthday but he got a puncture! OK, so it was in Belgium and he never actually made it over the channel so it wasn't the greatest of starts! The day vastly improved when we got to Mum and Dads though... the first glass of bubbly always helps plus one of my favourite things for lunch followed by Mums version of Eton Mess with Raspberries rather than strawberries and I was in heaven! The cake was made by my younger sister (as she keeps reminding me) and one small person was VERY fond of the over sized chocolate buttons....

In the Evening Sue and Dave came over so I hit another bottle of the bubbly stuff and it's safe to say it was strong! One glass and I was slightly off balance.... two and standing was a slight challenge!! Thankfully Friday wasn't a very early start in Mikey world and I got up, changed him and left Andy to do breakfast spooning into mouth type stuff! I retired back to bed for a while before venturing downstairs to see if my head could cope with early morning Disney Junior! (It couldn't...It is safe to say it hurt!) The original plan for Friday had been to go to Leeds Castle but the forecast wasn't brilliant so we chickened out and had a veg out day at home! It has been nice this week to just have time to be the 3 of us... something we don't really get much chance to do!

Yesterday was a challenge for Andy as he organised his first ever BBQ!! Dad had got us a charcoal chimney for starting the coals off which made things easier for him, but he did all the cooking and even did things like hard boil eggs for the salad (OK, I put the salad together but he was cooking the meat at the time!) He handled it all really well and even cleaned the grill afterwards! Once it starts to get warmer again I feel another BBQ coming on!!

Coming up stuff is not so much fun I'm afraid... on Friday I have my diabetes eye test. So far I've avoided having to have the drops to dilate my pupils as I was pregnant, that excuse is no longer valid so thankfully Mum is coming over to drive me to the test. I am capable of driving there but I can't drive after it and then next Monday poor Mikey has his next load of injections. The 3 he should have at 12 months plus his first MMR, which is spposed to be 13 months. I wasn't happy about them all being done in one go, but I've had a strong recommendation for get the MMR done as there is a good chance a measles epidemic is on the way and it can still be lethal for small people so I want him protected asap.

Bloody awful Mother...who cried for most of Sunday

It appears that I'm a terrible mother. I have let Mikey have a few treats as I'm having a birthday. He has had a tiny amount of birthday cake, the cream off a slice of banoffee pie and a taste of a doughnut. Apparently he is now going to be obese and his teeth are going to fall out. The person who made this accusation has never seen my son and has no idea that at his 12 month check up his growth and weight were classed as perfectly normal with no need for any concern - and this was at the end of June so not that long ago! I am proud that I have a happy, friendly child who so far has no sign of any fussy eating as he is trying a wide variety of foods - mostly in very small amounts and well controlled so he has an interesting and balanced diet, with the odd treat and a supply of fruit which he happily eats (more than me to be honest!) These accusations left me in tears for most of yesterday afternoon but my family and a wonderful friend jumped to my defence - something I am very grateful for. I am now seriously considering cancelling/closing my facebook page and wish I had a way of passing on just how hurt I am. I would have preferred to have had a private message rather than being accused publically of making my son obese etc.

Sorry for the rant but I have been hurt by this - those people who actually know me will know that we waited a very long time to be lucky enough to have Mikey and had enough scares during my pregnancy....add in my past medical history and Mikey is, in my mind a bit of a miracle and there is no way I will ever put my son at any risk...If someone has a problem about how I treat my son I'd happily discuss it calmly with them in person - and they really should at least see how Mikey and I interact and how healthy,happy and normal weighted he is.