Quiet week!

It's been a rather quiet few days Chez Zerfahs…I have got laryngitis again and my voice appears to have upped and left the building! To be honest it is very painful but at least it takes my mind off my headache which is now into the 3rd month! I had a CT scan a couple of weeks ago and finally saw a GP about it yesterday. Basically I do still have a brain and the re is nothing scary lurking in there - just very narrow blood vessels which are probably nothing to do with the headache! He also gave me some typed of painkiller but phoned home before I got back to tell me not to take them! Apparently they will have an adverse effect on my asthma which as we are going through a weather change right now is bad already… So I'm still on paracetamol which don't work and drinking gallons of water to try and keep my throat lubricated. Not that helps my voice, it's on a par with my paralysed vocal chord stage in 2008 - if they tell me to hum and cough I'm liable to flatten someone! Mikey thinks it's funny and I keep getting very quizzical looks and this morning he was stroking my throat. Luckily he hasn't got hands big enough to strangle his mum yet!


At the moment I'm grateful for e-mail as I've been trying to talk on the phone and it simply doesn't work - I know people can't hear/understand me and repeating it just puts more strain on a voice which has given up already. But e-mail means I can at least get on and although I should probably be at home resting my voice properly that would leave me with creeping brain death and a hell of a pile of stuff when I get back, I'd prefer to struggle on as I am for now.

Also I don't want to risk causing any more damage than it's already experienced, but I'm missing singing in the car on the way to and from work. OK it isn't a long journey but it's part of my routine and I enjoy it (not sure Mikey does…) I do seem to have caused some amusement at work, everyone around me seems to think it's funny - but I wasn't aware that I made that much noise normally anyway!

Mikey is currently really trying to find his feet, mainly using Daddy as a climbing frame and really not caring where feet, knees and elbows go which results in some odd noises and faces from Daddy - maybe I should try to find him some protection??? But he does keep telling me Mikey isn't getting a sibling - maybe Mikey is making sure he's an only child!?!?!? We can stand up holding something but we appear to have a wobbly bottom and crawling is obviously faster - especially when you can do an impression of a stampeding elephant across the floor! It looks as though this Christmas will be treeless as everything has to be explored and I think no would get a little boring after the 1st 10 minutes!!

Yet another month...nearly Christmas!!!!

First day back after 3 days off with my boys… It was Andy's Birthday last week so we were both off from Wednesday and Mikey was home with us too :) It was so nice to have time as a family and I had forgotten how funny my little boy can be! At one point he was upstairs with Daddy having a nappy change and all I could here was Mikey rabbiting on about something (your guess is as good as mine regarding what he was going on about) and when they came back down Andy was having a real problem keeping a straight face! Our son was looking very serious and still talking about whatever it was that he'd started on up stairs!

On Thursday we headed over to Leeds Castle as our tickets from last year were still valid. Mikey decided that every single person needed to be greeted with a loud 'Hello', and everytime he got one back the legs in the push chair went into overdrive! It was that exciting! But if he was ignored any subsequent greetings got louder and louder until he got at least one back! Unfortunately the birds in the aviary weren't as talkative this time - if they had been I'd imagine we'd still be there! There was also a Latin invasion of the maze, I have to admit I'm not sure if they were Spanish or Italian. I just know they were decidedly loud…Maybe Mikey should have joined them!

Friday was very exciting - I pushed him round to my hairdressers for a trim! His very first as it was nearly long enough to make a couple of small bunches! I was a very proud mum, he sat calmly on my lap and was very good as Abbie snipped away and tidied him up! We didn't go for a major chop so he still has his curls but no longer has mad hair when he wakes up in the morning! Hopefully Nanny will approve as I was warned not to let him end up looking like a thug - even though he acts like one most of the time! (Toy chucking is a favourite occupation at the moment!)

More thinking!!

One thing I'm noticing daily with Mikey now is the number of words he can use - not always the right one, but more and more each day! Last Friday I got him out of his cot to be met with a loud and very clear BEER, which was then repeated over and over until he was giggling too much to actually speak! It did make changing his nappy easier than usual as he was to busy giggling to wriggle! Yesterday over in Canterbury he was introduced to Bramble the cat - to which he loudly exclaimed BEAR and poked the poor cat! My sisters dog today has been ooooarley, Mikey's version of 'poor Barley' which apparently my sister was saying a lot! We also get Hello most of the day and pretty is also another popular word, other words of choice are baby, Yuk and Yum! Sometimes we get Mum - but that is usually when he forgets Yum and food is involved!


I know he is only 14 months old, but it is getting almost impossible to remember life without him now - he is such a huge part of my life I can feel guilty that I'm not paying Andy the attention he deserves - but then again Andy can look after himself, Mikey can't so far…. But on the other hand I do miss the days when I was Heather, rather than 'Mikey's Mum'. I know that is a title I wanted for a very long time, but I also want to be me as well… Not sure if that makes sense but I know what I mean!! I'm amazed Mum's don't end up with schizophrenia! After all at the moment I'm Andy's Wife, Mikey's Mum, URS Scott Wilson's Credit controller and way down at the bottom of the list I'm Heather (Ex Wilson) Zerfahs…No wonder I get confused easily! Maybe I should have a different coloured hat so I know who I'm being at any time????

Another thought I had over the weekend was that I'm missing my hormones! While I was pregnant and just after having Mikey they made my life pretty much hell… but now they've all calmed down or left the building so to speak , I'm missing them! It's hard to say exactly what I'm missing - only that I am missing it whatever it is! I'm sure Andy doesn't miss them - I have now pretty much managed to stop bursting into tears at adverts etc if they are overly cute, but I can't be sure that won't come back if some of last years Christmas adverts are repeated!! Although I did sort of suggest another baby to Andy as a cure for my headache (OK, it is a bit extreme!!) but then I thought a little more and if I'm honest, Mikey as a baby was pretty easy, but right now is a whole different story and not one I'm sure I'd want to repeat at 2 years older! Plus I doubt I'd produce another Mikey and the infamous saying in my family is that if 'Nicky had been born first she would have been an only child' Do I really want to inflict that on Andy and I???? Maybe a cat or kitten is a better idea but I doubt that would help my lack of hormones!!! But it would be cheaper than a baby…. (I doubt this subtle hint will work on my husband, but I already know asking for a kitten doesn't work either :-( I've given up on the puppy idea as we really don't have the space/room for one)

Emotional weekend

This weekend has been emotional for me...but thankfully the people around me have kept me laughing and pulled and pushed me through it!

My first hurdle was Saturday...10 years ago a friend died on the Friday and Andy hugged me all through the last night of the proms as I cried. We weren't married then but the Last Night always brings the memories back. Yesterday was made easier by the odd soprano who murdered some Rogers and Hammerstein before appearing in what can only be described as a cartoon get up for Rule Britannia... Her hat almost took off which did make me giggle!

Today was the 10th anniversary of the attacks on the Twin Towers, the Pentagon and the failed attack on the Capitol Building. I remember watching the news unfold on my PC at work and through various hone calls home as we kept losing the connection, and finding it almost impossible to believe what I was watching... I was used to terrorist attacks in the UK and in Europe thanks to various organisations (IRA etc) but there hadn't been any attack on mainland USA before just their embassy's abroad and one Naval ship. It was the day after that I heard someone I knew had been in one of the Towers but hadn't made it out before they collapsed. He was one of the sweetest men I had ever met and like so many other deaths at the hands of terrorists his was so pointless and I have no idea what killing him and the thousands of other people achieved other than to drag the western world into a war in the middle east where yet more totally innocent people have died. I was OK until they stared to read the lists of the names of the victims, then my tears started to fall again over such a waste of life...many of whom were doing work like I've done and still do, just earning a living for their families - nothing political or damaging to anyone else.

This afternoon we dashed over to Canterbury to see Andy's step mother who is briefly home from hospital. She has a couple of aneurysms which will need to be operated on so we 3 nipped over to see her, Mikey was on fine form and soon was taking on Grandad in a crawling competition around the kitchen...I wish I'd had a video camera with me! He also discovered quickly that if he cried he got chocolate buttons, I'm expecting him to pick up his Oscar next year after the performance he gave this afternoon! He did fall asleep on the way home - not a huge surprise after all the crawling races!!

August to September!

I have been meaning to update this for ages…but then again I've updated much more frequently than some other people so I'm not going to feel bad!!

Life has been pretty normal recently, Mikey has had his first experience of Bat Camp (he only visited for an afternoon, only 17 years until he can attend, although I doubt that it'll still be happening then!) The mad Spaniard has tried to convince him he wants to hack into the Pentagon and let him loose with his phone to try (thank goodness for toddler lock!!) Oh, and Mikey met a piggle! But he really isn't going to get one for Christmas as I know who would have to do the cleaning out and I've done that in the winter in the past so I'm not ready to do it again!

Currently Mikey is showing absolutely no inclination to walk! He is happy speed crawling and can get into trouble far to quickly doing just that. He has discovered buttons as well - he reprogrammed Grandad's Sky box and got his DVD player going at full volume without really doing anything….maybe he can control gadgets with the power of his mind!?!?!?!? I really must stop watching Dr Who! Mikey is now the proud owner of a sit on/push along car thing - but he only goes backwards!!?!?!? I guess that does lend itself to a comment about how the male brain works, but I love my little boy and I have his whole life to try to influence how his brain works (Bwa ha ha….evil mother laugh time!)

IN OTHER NEWS…. I have got my infamous headache back again, it did appear in the New Year but my Dr was more interested in arthritis so ignored it, I then started anew job so pushed it (literally) to the back of my mind, but about 5 weeks ago it came back with pain I haven't experienced for years. After a couple of weeks I gave in and saw a Dr (a locum as usual) who said it was a tension headache and gave me anti depressants which totally zombiefied me. I went back last week and saw yet another locum (who was about 16) who went for the inner ear infection diagnosis, even though I have no ear pain of any kind, but based on the fact I keep throwing up and going dizzy (I do have a headache - which could be having that effect!!) The pain this week is getting worse, but seeing as the weather is horrible I guess that is affecting how my head feels so I really don’t feel up to seeing yet another locum and being given whichever tablets are this weeks special offer.

Last weekend was my Dad's Birthday so all 3 of us (I love saying that) whizzed up the M20 on Saturday morning for a birthday BBQ, I went into proud Mum mode as a neighbours grandson was there who is a couple of month younger than Mikey and he played really well with him - he didn't even throw a toy at him or grab anything Matthew was playing with. the only things they both tried to grab was each others juice cup, but in Mikey's defence he has got one exactly like the one Matthew had at home! He tried a burger at lunch time but wasn't too impressed and preferred his fromage frais! By the time we got round to his spaghetti in the afternoon I think the poor little thing was starving so demolished it along with his bread and butter, slight carb overload but with all the dashing around the garden he did use up an awful lot of energy!

Sunday was quieter, he got to flirt with Emma again which is always a good thing so far as Mikey is concerned, she is much more fun that his old decrepit mother (Plus he doesn't see her everyday!) and he got part of a cookie and I think Nanny fed him far too much chocolate (I saw the state of his bed when I got him up on Monday morning) and he also had a toy change over…the animal train is now back downstairs along with his ark (If anyone has any fisher price animals they no longer want, he only has zebras giraffes and a couple of lions, so they would be welcomed on board!) I think it may be time for the storey of Noah's ark soon so he has an idea of what it is all about!

I also want to get his christening sorted soon…I had wanted it done soon after we came home from hospital but that was simply me being a paranoid mother, but it is something I wasn’t to have done preferable in the church we got married in, which is also where my sister got married and my nephew was christened…I suppose it is the closest thing we have to a family church - plus I helped runt he guide company there for ages and my sister met her husband at a youth group there so it has special memories for all of us!

1 other thing I'm looking forward to is Mikey being big enough to give me a hug… I admit I'm a softy but I'm also female and we need hugs on a regular basis just to keep us going….

Please can we have a little more summer?

This is not a good day - and it is purely down to the weather. I sometimes wonder if I am a victim of SAD as when it is grey and horrible like today I feel awful. Although my gorgeous little boy did make me laugh this morning - I'd tried my best to make sure he was protected against the deluge that was underway outside - but he was adamant that he wasn't having either hid sweatshirt hood or coat hood up. As we stepped outside the back door (well I stepped, he was carried) all IO could hear was a very loud 'UCK' and you just knew what sort of feeling he was trying to convey! So I am assuming that Uck in Mikey translates to Yuk! He was then silent for the whole trip to the childminder, no singing or anything - I have a feeling he was in sulk mode! And I know I shouldn't project what I think he is thinking but this morning it was just too easy and it cheered me up!!


I think Mikey was slightly disconcerted this morning as he is the only child there today…he was trying to look around the door into the lounge to see if anyone was there! I assume the Jack will be around so Mikey will get to try to turn off his PS whilst he's playing again! And also get lots of attention - which will suit him down to the ground after having had Nanny and Grandad running around after him yesterday! Apparently at one point Grandad was pretending to be a Giraffe…but seeing as Grandad tries to convince Mikey that his cow is a horse I'm not sure if he was really being a giraffe or maybe he was a panda….your guess is as good as mine!

My main problem today is actually getting inspired to do anything…I'm also shivering, probably due to this horrific weather! I'[m sure the office isn't actually as cold as I seem to think it is. My fingers are so cold that typing hurts and my spelling is unbelievably bad (not that it is ever good…thank goodness for spell check!) But my atrocious spelling doesn't slow the system down - it seems to be doing that for no reason at all , all by itself!

I am also sulking that my tube of Smarties seems to be missing the orange ones. At one point you could buy tubes of just orange Smarties….why did they stop doing that?? I like the orange ones far more than the others, the chocolate in them seems to be really grainy and the flavour isn't nice :-(

My nemesis is driving me up the wall as well today…the photocopier has dared to go wrong and the nice engineer has been out and fixed it - but it isn't good enough! As the poor man has pointed out the machine is old and basically wearing out so he can't get the resolution any better…Cue major sighing and whinging. I have been plugged into my Ipod trying to block some of the noise out but I failed miserable and I really can't take much more of this. He gives old women a bad name! And I can't even move around the desk and use Alan's desk as he has a laptop docking station and I have a PC :-( Although there is a strong chance I will move my PC around there so I can escape for a while….

My other problem during the day today has been shivering…I don't think the office has been cold - just me! I think whatever bug I've had over the last few days is still lurking and tomorrow I'm seriously considering wearing a nice warm jumper (do I sound really old now?!?!?!?) Although the forecast tomorrow is at least dry…I'd really like to see that big yellow thing that makes you feel warm if at all possible please!

Time Travel???

Well I currently feel as thought I've time travelled backwards to 2009…my infamous headache is back and making my life miserable right now (especially as Mikey has discovered that the table flap on the dining table makes a fantastic drum by either banging it or head butting it - bless him) It must be bad as I've even been to see a Dr… It's safe to assume I'll never see him again due to the wonders of my GP Surgery! They seem to get through Drs faster than I get through painkillers at the moment…heaven knows when this much heralded management change will happen, so for the moment they are happily bumbling along and making life as difficult for patients as they can! I was sat in the waiting room for nearly an hour on Monday and saw how rude the receptionists were to the people who came in. There was absolutely no need for the way they reacted to some people and I can quite understand why some people get so angry and upset, they aren't treated like human beings, just imbecilic beings who happen to have wandered in to make the receptionists like hell…


Not much has really happened recently … Mikey is still eating like a pig if we let him! He really is a bottomless pit in his head, and his cruel mother simply doesn't understand his need for constant refuelling! But if he slowed down the speed crawling a little life may become less focussed on where his next meal/snack etc will appear from! I'm not sure the pasta sandwiches he got on Monday helped and they are not something I'm planning to repeat any time soon! He did try raspberries again on Saturday…from the look on his face I think they may have been a little sharp! I was laughing too much to take a photo but a magic star soon helped to take his mind off it! He does like strawberries though… and raisins are almost as good as buttons, but the resulting nappies are not fun!!

Andy is currently redoing the Murder Mystery Party from last year for work, he did an article for an in-house e-mag about a hobby when he referred to it, next thing is he's re-doing it for his work colleagues…I only hope Dr Plum lives up to my original portrayal of her!

At work the system is on a major go slow…maybe we need new hamsters or even feed those we already have so they have a little more energy…Does Red Bull work on rodents??? My nemesis is also back from his holiday so the noise in my bit of the office has increased 10000000 fold… not helping my poor old head and retreating into the world of my Ipod isn't helping either - and if I listen to Paul McKenna I'll fall asleep! Not ideal (but very tempting!)