Week 30

As of today we've got to week 30...I am totaly amazed and to be honest starting to get decidedly scared. While I was getting well in 2008 I was slightly down at the thought I was not in a position to leave part of me behind (I think it was the day I was finally told how ill I'd been) and I sort of made a promise to myself that I would do whatever was needed to ensure I did! And the scary thing now is I've nearly achieved the promise I made....

One thing that is happening is I'm getting slightly paranoid about putting weight on! I know I have to but I also seem to want to hide the bump - almost as if I don't want people to realise I'm pregnant. The only rational thought I've come up with (well, as rational as I ever get) is that having lost so much weight and finally being able to buy stuff in 'normal' shops I'm scared of going back to being as big as I was. It was almost depressing to be able to keep up skirts I'd shrunk out of and when they got too tight it was horrible. Right now my wardrobe choice is really limited and I hate it (the fact one of the 2 summer skirts I can get on is white doesn't help either....me and white - do be serious!)

The SPD or PGP as it is apparently known as this week (!?!?!) is also getting to me. If I rest totally I feel good for a few hours and yesterday I only took 2 doses of painkillers. TOday I took a dose at lunchtime but if I'm honest right now I'm not feeling too good and I'm feeling really guilty about having a go at Andy simply because he parked too far away from the door at Sainsburys...I can't blame baby brain for that, just how much pain walking inflicts on me and seeing as I hadn't taken any painkillers up to that point I wasn't in the mood to go through any more pain than I had to...

I've been really cruel to him this weekend - yesterday I dragged him round Asda as they are having their Baby and Toddler Event... we now have a box of 70+ nappies (no idea how long they'll last to be honest) and a large box of wipes - but I know from spending time with Sam & Emily that they will be useful and it isn't as if they are going to go off!!Also got a Johnsons Baby Box - mainly cos I like the box if I'm truthful and I'm sure I'll find a use for it! It may be used to keep nappies in at a Grandparents house so I always have a supply to hand... Only need 2 more of them I guess!


 I have no idea what else I may need...I did find a really cute T shirt and shorts for £3 but Andy said no, and by that point I just wanted to load up the car with what we'd bought so I couldn't face arguing.....
 
Not really like me but I really was a long way from comfortable, plus I can always go back once I've got the all clear to drive again! (According to the Dr I shouldn't drive because of the co-codamol... As I think I've said I'm sulking as it really does feel as though I've regressed 2 years)

Friday...

I am really not enjoying being off work... still can't walk and I'm not allowed to drive because of the co-codamol I'm on so I basically feel trapped at home....Scarily it is the same feeling as I had when I came home after hospital in 2008 as I wasn't allowed to drive then plus I was still learning to walk again. Not a great feeling to have regressed 2 years....

But the good news is it looks as though my sister and family will be home tomorrow lunchtime, they are booked on a flight that leaves LAX at 5.35 (US time) and should land here around 12.05 tomorrow lunch time. Dad admitted yesterday that he was missing them - so am I. And I'm totally anti Iceland and their Volcano - I want my little sister back. Possibly not as much As Barley wants her back but I have missed her far more than I thought I would.

Poor Andy has really suffered this week. He's had to go to London every day and plod his way to the course which hasn't helped his feet and then he's had to contend with me starting Maternity earlier that we had intended and the SPD starting so he's been cooking too as standing is one hell of a challenge and inbelieveably painful. I had heard about SPD but was really hoping it was another part of being pregnant I was going to avoid! Thinking back over the last few weeks I have a feeling I may have experienced a few  symptoms but ignored them... my pain threshold must still be silly in the same way that I didn't notice the Kidney Stones etc!!!! Or the indigestion distracted me so I didn't notice it! I think I may have to hit the Gaviscon right now as someone is kicking or punching my stomach and the burning feeling has started again... bless him!

Big step forward..(and a bad pun) but I've just managed to walk normally up the stairs!!! The pain killers are great, still don't think I'd want to walk far and I can't drive, but I feel so happy at simply doing something the way I normally would. To me 'Normal' is a really important word right now...

I'm also watching 'In the Night Garden' I know it's aimed at little ones but it just annoys me - I so hope he won't like it if I can bring myself to let him watch it! According to Andy's countdown thig we have 58 days left...it fels odd as one second that feels like forever and then the next second I'm in a blind panic that it's hardly any time at all. There is still so much I need to learn and get ready for. If I'm honest I could do with another 10 months to be ready to look after him. How will I know when he is hungry, sleepy etc and how is he going to fit into the way Andy and I live or is every little thing going to change?? Is there anyway we can keep the life we enjoy and are used to?

All change

Saw my Midwife yesterday for a check up.Unfortunately my blood pressure has gone up a little which she really isn't happy with...I'm also in real pain and walking is really painful. Nicki has strongly suggested that I should go on Maternity Leave now  - I need to rest/relax and concentrate on having the baby... And sleep as and when I can.Plus the driving to Dover is far to much for me to cope with now so that is also ending...

We had the 1st Ante natal last last night, I think Andy enjoyed it, at least he now realises other men also have the same worries and feelings about the forthcoming arrival...I felt decidedly un-pregnant compared to a few of the other Mums...I need to do some serious bump growing over the next few weeks!

Waking up this morning was even more painful than yesterday...one I'd done the morning rush to the loo (She did talk about bladders alot yesterday!) I tried to get dressed which really was no fun as my legs didn't want to co-operate. I gave Nicki a call and then called the Maternity unit who think I have SPD... Unfortunately there is nothing that can be done for it but it should go once I have the baby. In the meantime I'll try to get an appointment with my GP tomorrow to at least get some strong painkillers, at least then I should hopefully start to feel a little more human

First Cycle & Pub of 2010!

Today was the first cycle ride and pub lunch of the year...as usual we took the easy option and drove! For which I'm really grateful... Not sure my centre of gravity is stable enough to allow me to balance on a bike!! And having seen some of the cyclists on ther arrival I'm not sure they were really up for some of the hills they tackled to arrive at the pub!

Apparently The Kings Head in Shadowhurst is well known for it's food...whoever said that wasn't exagerating! I had a Panini and a bowl of chips (was having a hungry day earlier!) and it was wonderful - and very filling!! I have to admit Kat decapitating prawns next to me was a tad off putting, but she soon got them all under control and stopped dropping body parts on the grass!!!

It was wonderful to be just sat in a pub garden under a clear blue sky soaking up some sun, I ha suggested my other half should have a cap with him but he didn't bother!!! Hopefully he didn't get too pink, I did get a little worried at one point but then realised the red umbrella was probably making things look worse that they were! I do worry about his head in the sun, at least I've got my mane to hide under - although I really want/need a haircut now as it has no style/shape at all!!

Vocano Fun

Only my sister could manage to get herself stuck in Los Angeles thanks to a Volcano erupting in Iceland! She has also got her room stay extended for as long as she needs it and so far as I’m aware is busy soaking up the sun and enjoying the last few rides at Disney Land that she may have missed so far! In the meantime the rest of us are still here ‘enjoying’ the first ever Election Debate and waiting for the ash to get dumped on us from a great height!!


The Volcano is helping our industry – although from the news coverage you’d think the only company benefitting is P&O! We were notably absent from all the news coverage last night – which annoyed me intensely but nothing I can do about it! As P&O keep stuffing down everyone’s throats they are the ‘favourite’ way to cross the channel… Apparently one Man called their call centre to get to Paris so he could fly to China…not sure if they told him French airspace was also closed at that point or if they simply sold him a ticket! Most of our senior Management Team are in Copenhagen at the moment – 3 are now in a taxi being driven to Dunkerque so they can then cross on one of our ships – if there is space for them of course!

At the moment I’d quite enjoy being on a ship going across the Channel, it is a glorious day in Dover, a light wind, blue skies and a calm sea…Maybe I’m just ready for another cruise (not a possibility unless we win the lottery any time soon…)

Had a minor panic this morning, there was a distinct lack of movement from the vicinity of the bump. I know I moan about being kicked but it is really odd when it doesn’t happen. All I can think of is that the serious kicking that has been happening this week has worn him out and he’s having a POETS day today and taking it easy. I am feeling the occasional movement now, but nothing big and drinking diet Coke seems to be encouraging him to move a little more for some reason! But it has certainly helped my stress levels that I can now feel something…I guess I’m really going to miss that once he is born.

14 April - update

I’ve been meaning to write for the last couple of days to be honest, but in the evenings I’m simply too tired to try to string words together that make any sense! Not that I make much sense on most other posts…


Yesterday was a scan an ante natal clinic morning…add into it yet another blood test for the diabetes team and I was at the hospital from just after 9.00 until just after 12.00. Not really how I wanted to spend the morning but essential for the growing bump. The blood test was my first port of call (trying to beat the blood clinic and my scan wasn’t until 10) I was in my ‘it’s my blood and you can’t have it mode’ and it took 2 of them to find any blood to take…but 3 holes later and yet another bruise on the back of my left hand and it was done just in time to head over to the X-Ray reception and then dash down to Foetal Medicine for my 28 week scan.

For once I had a successful scan – no problems identified and the fact we’re having a boy was confirmed…so I don’t need to change my paint choices thank goodness! He is growing just fine, not to big and weighs just under 3lbs apparently. I’m quite amazed how they work that out and it will be interesting to see how accurate it is! We did get 3 new photos of his face in profile – he’s rather too big to all fit on one photo now!

After the scan it was back to the clinic where I did notice the list of Drs on duty was rather short compared to most weeks…just 2 of them! I passed my notes over as usual and waited to be called by the midwife. Rather nerve racking if I’m honest as they do blood pressure and check for protein which was where I had the problem last time. My Midwife has suggested they are using the wrong size cuff when they test my BP, and I should ask them to change it. When I mentioned that I got glared at so I kept quiet and guess what…my BP Has gone up slightly, but certainly not in a danger level and not anything to worry about! My sample was clear as well and I’ve pretty much just put on the weight the baby has! (His weight plus the extra fluid!!!)

Then it was back into the waiting room…I really must learn to take a book with me (mine was in the boot of my car!) before I went in to see the Diabetes team. They are still quite happy/pleased with me and I’m staying on Metformin and still don’t have to inject insulin yet. It may still happen before he is born but I’m hopeful it won’t and I’m trying to be good… OK so it doesn’t always happen, but I am trying! Once I’d had a quick chat and they’d checked my results book it was back to the waiting room which was rapidly overfilling and far too hot. Plus a small boy was throwing himself onto the floor at very regular intervals (I think he was bored) and making a racket, added to by hi mother threatening him with an almost endless stream of ‘I’ll take….away’ which he proceeded to ignore!

The midwife came out every so often to try and find extra Drs and at about 11.45 one very smart man in a suit dashed in. The first bundle of files he grabbed was massive and the woman sat next to me declared it was hers….nope, it was mine! My Maternity file is now about 8 inches thick, possible more and there was no way the poor man could hope to plough through it all quickly, but he stuck mainly to my hand held notes – very wise!

They are quite happy with my and the boys progress and after a quick listen to his heart and him trying to kick to consultant again! I was allowed to escape! After having a quick Braxton Hicks Contraction which wasn’t fun but at least I had someone there telling me what was happening! I know 2 people who weren’t impressed by it and one of them spent most of the rest of the day kicking me to prove how annoyed he was! At least I had a more successful visit that one woman who was taken away on a trolley as she was showing distinct signs of pre-eclampsia…having watched Holby last night which showed exactly that I’m relieved I’ve stopped showing any signs now, I don’t want to be rushed in for an emergency C-Section so I’ve also suggested to Andy that he comes to my appointments from now on – I don’t want to go through that on my own!!

I’m very aware how tired I am now. Last night I headed to bed at around 10 – which is about as late as I can go. Andy fell asleep on the sofa and finally appeared at just after 2.00am. I wasn’t impressed, especially considering earlier comments about how huge I’m getting…and had woken up – just after he got into bed someone else woke up too and proceeded to demonstrate just how good he is at kicking…his father felt it for a while then rolled over and started snoring, I wish I could do that but rolling over just seems to make him kick more…

Another thing I’m aiming for is keeping calm…so filling the car with petrol is not the way to go. In Dover as I was leaving last night it was 121.9 – which it has been for days. I decided to wait until I got back to Ashford, huge mistake, Sainsburys was the same price so £30+ later I had a full tank and a rather stressed feeling, at this rate my son won’t be learning to drive as it will be something not many people do once he grows up as nobody will be able to afford fuel.. I also don’t see how we will be able to take him overseas to places like WDW as the fuel price is going to have to impact flights soon too. I was almost relieved to hear that the Freight Transport lot are finally getting wound up about fuel prices – about time. It is hardly an election issue as far as I can see and I think it should be. On Sunday Sainsburys was 120.9, but Tuesday it was 121.9, I know the pound is currently weak but I can’t see how the increase, within 2 days, can be justified. I want someone to explain it to me in language I can understand and also tell me what they are planning to do about it… before I have to remortgage the house simply to drive to work.

28 Weeks tomorrow

It is now official - I am getting scared! As of tomorrow I am 7 months pregnant and only have 10 weeks to go as the baby is arriving at 38 weeks... Isn't diabetes a wonderful thing!

I think the cravings are getting worse at the moment...I think I can smell chicken nuggets and McDonalds fries whenever I walk into the kitchen - crazy or what! Luckily Andy is at work at the moment so I'll just try to ignore the craving feeling - maybe it's worse as my blood sugar is down below 6 again and that always makes me feel a little odd... (good excuse or what!!)

Our little bundle of joy had me awake just after 3 this morning...and then my dearly beloved husband started some kind of early warning alarm for something so between the pair of them going back to sleep simply wasn't going to happen! I ended up getting up ust after Andy did so maybe I may resort to an afternoon nap! But the chances of that actually happening are looking remote as I'll probably find something I urgently need to do and it simply can't wait! One day I'll grow up and be sensible...until then I'll just carry on muddling through!

I wish I'd had a camera at work yesterday, my phone isn't good enough - there was a kind of optical illusion as I left the office. There was a thin covering of mist across the surface of the channel and the ships all looked as thought they were floating above the surface of the water. It was a brilliant blue sky and sunny and felt amazingly peaceful to be honest. My immediate reaction was to find somewhere to park the car and just go to sleep, but I needed to get home to collect some stuff from the pharmacy as I'd nearly run out of blood pressure stuff...not a great idea in my condition! As it was I had a slow drive home (still trying to be as economical as possible with petrol) and still made it in time to cause chaos when I collected my prescriptions! The people who make the blood pressure stuff are having problems with one of the main ingrediants (they can't get it!) so I now have 500mg tablets which I have to spilt every day so I get the right doseage!! Maybe I should invest in a pill splitter rather than wave large knives around...I have a feeling that would be far safer for my fingers!!!

My hormones are still all over the place...I watched an episoe of Glee earlier and ended up crying my eyes out for no reason at all. But I felt better for it and my midwife keeps telling me it helps keep my blood pressure down so I'm not going to fight it! Probably a good thing as Andy has just got home and is stressing out and I can feel my presure level going up as he stomps around... Guess I'd better go and feed him seing as he's been at work and I've just been stuffing things in the washing machine this morning! Not exactly taxing!

The cough is still going really well and to be honest the antibiotics are showing no signs of doing anything - but I guess my voice is now working better, but I can't stop coughing...although trying to seems to make it even worse and the baby really doesn't enjoy it, I guess coughing causes squashed baby syndrome so a fight back starts which usually makes me cough more!! This could be an interesting relationship once the baby is here!!!

Easter + Anniversary = Pigging Out

Well Easter was fantastic - the weather was nowhere near as bad as the forecasts but the coughing was horrible...Saturday night was painful as someone objected to any coughing fairly strongly!

Nicki, the Midwife, was here Sunday morning and we both got a clean bill of health eclampsia wise but a fairly firm instruction to contact SEADOC regarding the cough as she was concerned it was an infection rather than just a hayfever related cough as I thought. We didn't phone them on Sunday as we went to my parents for lunch - always wonderful as I don't cook...I just stir!!!

Sitting around at Mum & Dad's was very relaxing - even introducing Dad to Facebook was stress free (no way was I letting him loose with my password and access to my account!) and we got home just after 7 so relaxed some more before settling down to watch Johnathan Creek!

Monday was a much better nights sleep - but I woke up coughing well so called SEADOC as instructed and it was suggested I go in to see them so thay could check my breathing etc and see if I needed antibiotics or not. We were told to be there for 1.30 so we decided to drop off the pair of crutches we'd uncovered in the Baby's room! We were out again by 1.40 with a prescription for antibiotics and a new steroid Asthma spray to help me breath/sleep etc! So a quick stop at Sainsburys and I was all done before we headed over the The Pheasant for the family fun day with Chippy, Sam & Emily. It was nice to just get out and sit and talk - probably what I needed to be honest!

Tuesday - Our  8th Wedding Anniversary and apparently it is Bronze this year! I'm afraid that didn't enter my head and to be honest I didn't have a clue that's what is was! Andy bought me a gorgeous new watch, similar to my current one but with a rather nice subtle difference! And it fits perfectly - what more could I want! We headed over to a pub in Brook for lunch... I did remember it once we arrived ' The Honest Miller' and I remembered the Landlord who isn't Welsh as I was advised at first but is a Geordie! We both had Lamb Shanks which were totally delicious and fell off the bone, with mashed potato, a mint gravy and mixed veg... I must confess I demolished the lot and then moved onto a chocolate Brownie with Mint Choc Chip Ice cream - seeing as I've been craving ice cream (and that flavour) since yesterday it was most welcome and didn't last long to be brutally honest! Andy had Jam Roly Poly with a lake of custard and his vanished too!

I really feel that we need to revisit the pub once the Saturday bike rides start again ...the sandwiches wihich went outside with the bowls of chips looked totally gorgeous even to a stuffed Mum to be!!!! Failing that I want to go there for lunch for my Birthday...Sharon the chef is fantastic :)

The week didn't really get better...

I now have a streaming cold, cough and a throat that feels as though sandpaper would feel more soothing!  I also have a baby who really hasn't got the hang of letting Mum sleep at night...having read Dr Spock last night I can see that we are going to have to do some serious baby training once the baby is here!

My Midwife was quite amazed with my Blood pressure on Monday but it went downhill a little on Tuesday at the hospital as the results were a little higher (still not as high as i have done and not exactly dangerous at the moment) plus I'm also showing protein in my urine which is apparently not a good thing... So my poor midwife is coming out to see me on Sunday morning to test everything again for me. I'm doing my best not to worry, but if I'm tod to rest then that is what I'm doing...we've waited far too long for this baby already so I'm not risking anything.

Maybe I'll read Dr Spock to the baby and it may sink in so no baby training will be needed!!I can live in hope anyway!

Dear Mr Darling is still not helping my stress levels...FUel tax/duty (or whatever he's calling it now) went up 1p today...so why on earth did the price at the petrol stations on the A20 go up from 117.9 to 120.9? I know my maths can be suspect at times but I'm sure that is a 3p rise which is supposed o be the total amount over the next 11 months... I guess BP could just be cashing in but I'm certainly not buying petrol from them in the foreseeable future unless I get a 2nd mortgage to pay for a tank of petrol!

The lorries are still behaving (mostly) on the A20 although one of them has decided they don't like the sign banning tem from overtaking and has demolished it! But coming out of Dover this afternoon was fairly easy and more fun than fighting through lorries as they escape to the M20. It also helps that the lane on the M20 they blocked off has been reopened, always better :)