If you are looking for a new hobby or recreational activity, make sure it is a creative activity that you can pursue without spending yourself silly. You have some wonderfully creative aspects right now, but you are drawn to pricey, shiny things and that could cost a lot.

So it appears I need a new, creative yet cheap new hobby...everything I've considered trying in the past would be fairly expensive just to set up to start, I still have some cross stitch kits but I need a  lamp with a daylight bulb just to sort out and use the right colours... so any bright ideas, please let me know!!

Mikey and I have had a pretty good week so far (OK, I know it's only Tuesday!) But today has been totally tantrum free and Mikey has been quite adorable. And he has only redecorated the tree a couple of times and he is starting to put things back on the tree... We are still having fun getting him to eat though. On Sunday we went to my Sisters for Christmas Lunch (as they are heading Stateside at the end of this week) and Mikey really was not in an eating mood, stupidly I tried to push a bit and he simply grabbed a wine glass and threw it on the tiled floor! It didn't bounce...thankfully it was an Ikea special rather then crystal or anything like that.

Job hunting is really getting me down now...I'm still angry that I got the system at my last place of employment working so well. I did exactly what they wanted but not with the American Ledger as they simply didn't let me get my hands on it. If I had been given the chance to work on it I could have got that sorted and the overdue debt into a much more manageable state and kept a job I enjoyed. Instead I am now getting the 'You would get bored, you're over qualified and we're not even going to bother replying other than to tell you that you have not been successful at this time' It is getting extremely disheartening and I have no idea what to do right now (other than curl up in bed and cry, hoping the world will leave me alone) 

I'm also not feeling ready for Christmas yet, usually by now I'm feeling excited and looking forward to the 'big day' but I'm not feeling anything at all. I've tried watching Christmas films, listening to Christmas Music but nothing seems to be working. Maybe I'm trying too hard as this is the first Christmas Mikey has really been getting involved in, I doubt he'll remember this but I want it to be perfect for him... He is going to have to come food shopping with me on Thursday, this is when I'm going to hope that the lack of tantrums continues!! Provided I actually manage to find a parking space there of course... I had done the shopping on line, but I can't us nectar points there and having been saving them up I'd prefer to use them towards the Christmas food! I'm also nipping into Waitrose as they sent me a voucher to use with my 'My Waitrose' card - right now I'm taking all the help I'm sent!

Mikey has been getting really engrossed in the Early Learning Centre catalogue! He gets totally over excited and he ends up jumping up and down like a total lunatic, usually on my foot so there is a good chance I'll be on crutches by the time we get to Christmas...if I am they are going to get decorated!!! But he's only mastered jumping recently so takes every opportunity he can to demonstrate!!! I'm still trying to sell some of his younger aged toys, but getting nowhere fast...maybe I'll send them to the next NCT sale...but from what I've heard we are going to need quite a bit of space for everything that Father Christmas will deliver on the night of the 24th!!

Mid December Blues

I am feeling a tad down right now and I'm having a bit of an issue picking up the Christmas 'Buzz' But we do now have a tree (which I really missed last year) and Mikey is having a lovely time trying to blow the lights out! And as we have twinkly lights he thinks he's managed it on many occasions!! He has now lost interest in removing decorations and tinsel, much to Andy's relief!!

We tried to sort of kick start Christmas on Sunday and were planning on taking Mikey to Bybrook Barn to visit Father Christmas. Inside the centre it was very christmassy but there was no sign of the big man. I found an assistant who told me he was outside. As we walked to the door there was a sign to the 'Santa Fe land train' as we walked out it arrived as was a small tractor disguised as a train engine with a small coach with visitors and Captain Hook inside. At this point Mikey freaked out, there was no point trying to get him onto the train so we walked down the side of a rather haphazard looking shed. As we walked past a door back into the centre Mikey pushed me inside and told me clearly 'Not Now' so we left! I really don't want him to be scared of Father Christmas and miss out on the tradition of leaving a mince pie and carrot out on Christmas Eve. I did it for years and I'd like him to follow suit. We have now booked him into Dobbies for next Friday to visit the Big Man there with Mummy and Daddy, hopefully they don't have a noisy train!!

It has also been fun recently with Mikey hitting the 'terrible twos' in a big way! Last week we had a major melt down just because Daddy left the Outlet Centre without him (we'd met him there to go round Hamleys) and at the moment simply saying no to him has the same effect. We also got it a few times today when a programme finished before he was ready for it to end. Personally I am losing the will to live with an endless rotation of Thomas and Friends, Fireman Sam and Roary the Racing Car. I am also keeping all presents well hidden at the moment as I'm not sure he could resist them since he has now learnt how to open presents, whoever they are really for!

My sister has now moved into her dream house, I've only seen the estate agents photos so far but apparently it is big enough for Mikey to drive his car around the ground floor... everyone had better protect their ankles as  I'm not sure how in control of the vehicle he is so far...

Toddler Mood Swings

http://siplumb.wordpress.com/2012/12/02/25/

Just read this and it was scary how much I could identify with it...Right now I'm working hard to keep upbeat and positive, mainly for Mikey's sake if I'm honest - he is a wonderful reason most of the time that keeps me going.

I was doing well until this evening. I had arranged with Andy to meet him at the outlet centre so we could take Mikey to Hamley's to see if we could find anything else for Christmas for him. When I picked him up he had a mini tantrum as I tried to get him into the car, which was calmed down by telling him we were going to meet Daddy - although as we arrived he was asking for Nanny and Grandad!! He wasn't impressed that I put him in his pushchair but cheered u as he saw Daddy and he had a good look around (The Weeble Yellow School Bus certainly grabbed his attention) But as time went on he lost interest and started screaming so I made a hasty exit as the screaming volume and intensity was increasing far too quickly. Daddy walked part of the way back to my car but as he left the volume went up even more and as I tried to get him out of the chair he went crazy, screaming and Kicking whilst refusing to bend to fit into his chair. Once I had almost got him in he threw himself sideways to fall out of the chair and found he can just about stand up straight on the back seat. When I went to the other side he moved to stand in the middle and when I tried to touch him screamed even more.

Eventually I convinced him that if he let me put him in his chair we could get home and then he'd see Daddy again. As I tried to get him into his seat again he did the rigid thing again and started screaming for help. At this point an older woman walked back to her car which was parked nose to nose with mine. At this point he decided that he needed to breath so I heard her comment to her companions that I must be a terrible mother as I couldn't even get my child into his car seat. I was nearly in tears by this point and Mikey again threw himself out of his seat and returned to his position in the middle of the back seat and told me he wasn't using his seat. At this point I got into the car and calmly explained that Mummy is not allowed to drive the car if he isn't in his seat.  Eventually he agreed to let me strap him in safely and we arrived home to find he'd dropped the thing with the most importance to him...his dummy, lucky for him Daddy went out and found it. And he did eventually say sorry and give me a hug - but he also said sorry to Daddy...guess I know now where my  place is in his list of priorities...certainly below his dummy.

Endings...and beginnings

My horoscope today:

You need to stretch out and relax today. Don't let your work-related worries or a family problem get under your skin. You may find that a little time alone with some good music and some comfort food could work wonders on your mood and sense of wellness.

So all I need is to put my feet up, decide what is good music for today and find some comfort food...Might just charge up my i-pod and stick it on shuffle and I'm sure there must be a comfort food stash somewhere in the house - if there isn't the tub of celebrations may not last much longer!!

Poor Mikey still has a streaming cold and a cough. Last night he was having so much trouble breathing it sounded like whooping cough, but he has had 3 lots of immunisation so far and is due the last one next October. NHS Direct really calmed me down last night, I'd been calm upstairs with Andy, but only really relaxed once I'd read that he is protected. Why couldn't he have got chicken pox so all I need to do is stop him scratching!!!

We've also had day 1 of the new Advent Calendar, Mikey did have one last year, but this year it is altogether more exciting!! This has arrived courtesy of Nanny and Grandad and is a large stocking with 24 pockets on the front and a candy cane to move each day. Mikey had his treat for today, thoroughly enjoyed his chocolate and then asked for the next one!! In his defence Grandad had a magic pocket yesterday that produced a lindt chocolate bear and a kinder bar (like the one he had this morning) so my small pig seemed to think he would get more than one a day!! But I'm sure he will soon work it out and Christmas will become more exciting for him as he does!! We have still to go and see Father Christmas although he did get a letter from the top man this morning - apparently he is about the same height as the elves at the moment! Mikey wasn't to sure what to make of this, and I'm not sure Father Christmas will understand him when he gets going! I know Andy and I don't and end up trying to make the best guess with the odd word we do understand!!

One thing we do know is no presents an go under the tree until Christmas Eve as Mikey has worked out the tearing wrapping paper off is a great occupation, but he doesn't care who they are actually for!! So Santa can't make any early deliveries this year as Mikey can't read labels yet...

Yesterday was a rather strange end to my time at CSL...as Mikey was so poorly I stayed at home with him and then had a diabetes eye test in the afternoon. Not exactly fun as they dilate your pupils with some stuff which stings so far as I'm concerned. 2 photos are taken of each eye - and usually it takes more than 4 attempts for get photos of my eyeballs as my blink reflex is pretty fast. But the technician yesterday threatened to tape my eyes open so I managed to slow my blink down! But after 4 photos she was happy and I was allowed to leave, much to my relief and with a horrible headache which carried on all of yesterday evening, but does seem to have vanished mostly today thank goodness - although my legs doesn't seem to want to do what I want today and the family curse of painful knees has returned again - but I'm leaving the operations and platelet infusions to Nicky and the replacements to Mum!! So my exit from CSL happened on Wednesday with me dashing home just after 3 as Mikey was not a well little boy - and he is the most important person in my life now.

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