More thinking!!

One thing I'm noticing daily with Mikey now is the number of words he can use - not always the right one, but more and more each day! Last Friday I got him out of his cot to be met with a loud and very clear BEER, which was then repeated over and over until he was giggling too much to actually speak! It did make changing his nappy easier than usual as he was to busy giggling to wriggle! Yesterday over in Canterbury he was introduced to Bramble the cat - to which he loudly exclaimed BEAR and poked the poor cat! My sisters dog today has been ooooarley, Mikey's version of 'poor Barley' which apparently my sister was saying a lot! We also get Hello most of the day and pretty is also another popular word, other words of choice are baby, Yuk and Yum! Sometimes we get Mum - but that is usually when he forgets Yum and food is involved!


I know he is only 14 months old, but it is getting almost impossible to remember life without him now - he is such a huge part of my life I can feel guilty that I'm not paying Andy the attention he deserves - but then again Andy can look after himself, Mikey can't so far…. But on the other hand I do miss the days when I was Heather, rather than 'Mikey's Mum'. I know that is a title I wanted for a very long time, but I also want to be me as well… Not sure if that makes sense but I know what I mean!! I'm amazed Mum's don't end up with schizophrenia! After all at the moment I'm Andy's Wife, Mikey's Mum, URS Scott Wilson's Credit controller and way down at the bottom of the list I'm Heather (Ex Wilson) Zerfahs…No wonder I get confused easily! Maybe I should have a different coloured hat so I know who I'm being at any time????

Another thought I had over the weekend was that I'm missing my hormones! While I was pregnant and just after having Mikey they made my life pretty much hell… but now they've all calmed down or left the building so to speak , I'm missing them! It's hard to say exactly what I'm missing - only that I am missing it whatever it is! I'm sure Andy doesn't miss them - I have now pretty much managed to stop bursting into tears at adverts etc if they are overly cute, but I can't be sure that won't come back if some of last years Christmas adverts are repeated!! Although I did sort of suggest another baby to Andy as a cure for my headache (OK, it is a bit extreme!!) but then I thought a little more and if I'm honest, Mikey as a baby was pretty easy, but right now is a whole different story and not one I'm sure I'd want to repeat at 2 years older! Plus I doubt I'd produce another Mikey and the infamous saying in my family is that if 'Nicky had been born first she would have been an only child' Do I really want to inflict that on Andy and I???? Maybe a cat or kitten is a better idea but I doubt that would help my lack of hormones!!! But it would be cheaper than a baby…. (I doubt this subtle hint will work on my husband, but I already know asking for a kitten doesn't work either :-( I've given up on the puppy idea as we really don't have the space/room for one)

Emotional weekend

This weekend has been emotional for me...but thankfully the people around me have kept me laughing and pulled and pushed me through it!

My first hurdle was Saturday...10 years ago a friend died on the Friday and Andy hugged me all through the last night of the proms as I cried. We weren't married then but the Last Night always brings the memories back. Yesterday was made easier by the odd soprano who murdered some Rogers and Hammerstein before appearing in what can only be described as a cartoon get up for Rule Britannia... Her hat almost took off which did make me giggle!

Today was the 10th anniversary of the attacks on the Twin Towers, the Pentagon and the failed attack on the Capitol Building. I remember watching the news unfold on my PC at work and through various hone calls home as we kept losing the connection, and finding it almost impossible to believe what I was watching... I was used to terrorist attacks in the UK and in Europe thanks to various organisations (IRA etc) but there hadn't been any attack on mainland USA before just their embassy's abroad and one Naval ship. It was the day after that I heard someone I knew had been in one of the Towers but hadn't made it out before they collapsed. He was one of the sweetest men I had ever met and like so many other deaths at the hands of terrorists his was so pointless and I have no idea what killing him and the thousands of other people achieved other than to drag the western world into a war in the middle east where yet more totally innocent people have died. I was OK until they stared to read the lists of the names of the victims, then my tears started to fall again over such a waste of life...many of whom were doing work like I've done and still do, just earning a living for their families - nothing political or damaging to anyone else.

This afternoon we dashed over to Canterbury to see Andy's step mother who is briefly home from hospital. She has a couple of aneurysms which will need to be operated on so we 3 nipped over to see her, Mikey was on fine form and soon was taking on Grandad in a crawling competition around the kitchen...I wish I'd had a video camera with me! He also discovered quickly that if he cried he got chocolate buttons, I'm expecting him to pick up his Oscar next year after the performance he gave this afternoon! He did fall asleep on the way home - not a huge surprise after all the crawling races!!

August to September!

I have been meaning to update this for ages…but then again I've updated much more frequently than some other people so I'm not going to feel bad!!

Life has been pretty normal recently, Mikey has had his first experience of Bat Camp (he only visited for an afternoon, only 17 years until he can attend, although I doubt that it'll still be happening then!) The mad Spaniard has tried to convince him he wants to hack into the Pentagon and let him loose with his phone to try (thank goodness for toddler lock!!) Oh, and Mikey met a piggle! But he really isn't going to get one for Christmas as I know who would have to do the cleaning out and I've done that in the winter in the past so I'm not ready to do it again!

Currently Mikey is showing absolutely no inclination to walk! He is happy speed crawling and can get into trouble far to quickly doing just that. He has discovered buttons as well - he reprogrammed Grandad's Sky box and got his DVD player going at full volume without really doing anything….maybe he can control gadgets with the power of his mind!?!?!?!? I really must stop watching Dr Who! Mikey is now the proud owner of a sit on/push along car thing - but he only goes backwards!!?!?!? I guess that does lend itself to a comment about how the male brain works, but I love my little boy and I have his whole life to try to influence how his brain works (Bwa ha ha….evil mother laugh time!)

IN OTHER NEWS…. I have got my infamous headache back again, it did appear in the New Year but my Dr was more interested in arthritis so ignored it, I then started anew job so pushed it (literally) to the back of my mind, but about 5 weeks ago it came back with pain I haven't experienced for years. After a couple of weeks I gave in and saw a Dr (a locum as usual) who said it was a tension headache and gave me anti depressants which totally zombiefied me. I went back last week and saw yet another locum (who was about 16) who went for the inner ear infection diagnosis, even though I have no ear pain of any kind, but based on the fact I keep throwing up and going dizzy (I do have a headache - which could be having that effect!!) The pain this week is getting worse, but seeing as the weather is horrible I guess that is affecting how my head feels so I really don’t feel up to seeing yet another locum and being given whichever tablets are this weeks special offer.

Last weekend was my Dad's Birthday so all 3 of us (I love saying that) whizzed up the M20 on Saturday morning for a birthday BBQ, I went into proud Mum mode as a neighbours grandson was there who is a couple of month younger than Mikey and he played really well with him - he didn't even throw a toy at him or grab anything Matthew was playing with. the only things they both tried to grab was each others juice cup, but in Mikey's defence he has got one exactly like the one Matthew had at home! He tried a burger at lunch time but wasn't too impressed and preferred his fromage frais! By the time we got round to his spaghetti in the afternoon I think the poor little thing was starving so demolished it along with his bread and butter, slight carb overload but with all the dashing around the garden he did use up an awful lot of energy!

Sunday was quieter, he got to flirt with Emma again which is always a good thing so far as Mikey is concerned, she is much more fun that his old decrepit mother (Plus he doesn't see her everyday!) and he got part of a cookie and I think Nanny fed him far too much chocolate (I saw the state of his bed when I got him up on Monday morning) and he also had a toy change over…the animal train is now back downstairs along with his ark (If anyone has any fisher price animals they no longer want, he only has zebras giraffes and a couple of lions, so they would be welcomed on board!) I think it may be time for the storey of Noah's ark soon so he has an idea of what it is all about!

I also want to get his christening sorted soon…I had wanted it done soon after we came home from hospital but that was simply me being a paranoid mother, but it is something I wasn’t to have done preferable in the church we got married in, which is also where my sister got married and my nephew was christened…I suppose it is the closest thing we have to a family church - plus I helped runt he guide company there for ages and my sister met her husband at a youth group there so it has special memories for all of us!

1 other thing I'm looking forward to is Mikey being big enough to give me a hug… I admit I'm a softy but I'm also female and we need hugs on a regular basis just to keep us going….